QUOTE-ALONG MADNESSSSSS!!!

FOUR HUGE QUOTE-ALONGS IN ONE LITTLE WEEK
featuring:

EVIL DEAD 2 QUOTE-ALONG
Friday and Saturday, May 1 & 2, Midnights at the Ritz
Advance tix available here

ZOOLANDER QUOTE-ALONG
Sunday, May 3, 7pm at the Ritz
Final Zoolander show! Advance tix available here

THE THREE AMIGOS QUOTE-ALONG
Monday, May 4, 7pm at the Ritz
with a special FEAST-ALONG on Tuesday, Cinco de Mayo, 7pm at the Ritz
Advance tix available here

AIRPLANE! QUOTE-ALONG
THURSDAY, MAY 7, 7pm at the Ritz
Advance tix available here

During most of our screenings at the Alamo, we are pretty vigilant about making sure you shut the f*ck up during the movie. But with the Quote-Along parties we've been putting on for the past two years now, we're just as adamant about making sure you open the f*ck down during the show.

Okay, so that's not technically the opposite for shutting up, but whatever the phrasing you'd rather use, the idea of a Quote-Along is that you take the movie off the screen, into your heart, and then toss it back out into the air around you with your vocal chords. Simultaneously, everyone else in the theater will be yelling out the same amazing lines of dialogue with you, and before you know it your soul will enter the gates of Nerdvana and you'll be transported to a new spiritual level of geekdom.

We subtitle our favorite lines and provide props to help you get there, but ultimately it's the magic of a theater full of fans that turns the ordinary experience of watching one of your favorite movies for the 10,000th time into a thing of absolute beauty.

In fact, we're such strong fans of the Quote-Along parties that we decided to load this week up to overflowing so fans of all sorts of different movies could come out and see what all the fuss is about for themselves.

First up, we've got EVIL DEAD 2. Bruce Campbell solidified his reign as king of the B-movie gods with his role as Ash in this film, and I've never looked at the word "groovy" the same way again. With Sam Raimi's return to horror coming at the end of this month with the hotly anticipated DRAG ME TO HELL, we couldn't pass up the chance to bring EVIL DEAD 2 back to the Quote-Along world.

We'll be starting with a My Hand Went Bad contest, and during the movie we'll have eyeballs flying around the theater and blood gushing up from your seat.

Then on Sunday evening, we're bringing back one more showing of April's ridiculously good looking ZOOLANDER QUOTE-ALONG. That one will start with a Walk Off competition, and throughout the movie we'll have all sorts of fun with Blue Steel. Plus - Orange Mocha Frappucinos!!!!

Monday night we're starting two nights of THREE AMIGOS, because oh my god Steve Martin makes me happy. Our head chef at the Ritz, Trish Eichelberger, pitched the idea for this show last year because she wanted a chance to put together a fun mini-feast for Cinco de Mayo, and last year she way out did herself. Judging from this year's menu, she's set to outdo it all again.

Regardless of whether you're interested in learning what a plethora is or not, this one is worth the price of admission for the avocado margaritas alone. The feast is only available on Tuesday, but for everyone who wants to enjoy the movie and can't handle the full four course fun, we've got a movie-only screening on Monday just for you.

Thursdays at 7pm is our usual weekly slot for Quote-Alongs at the Ritz, and on May 7 we're starting our May series of Quote-Alongs with the debut night of AIRPLANE! We always try to go all out with props and special effects that will help bring the action from the screen out into the theater, but we *promise* that we'll fight our urges to actually throw shit at a fan during the movie. We'll also be serving up special "Don't call me Shirley" Temples just for those shows.

You can catch our full line up of upcoming Quote-Alongs on the constantly updated Quote-Along Signature Event page on our website. And if you're on Facebook, you can stay updated by becoming a fan of our Facebook Page: Alamo Quote-Alongs.

(Henri)

The Doctor Is In

DOCTOR INFIERNO with Filmmakers Live!
Tonight at the Alamo Ritz
Tickets available here

Cyber Monkey Death Squad presents DOCTOR INFIERNO with director Paco Limon and star/associate-producer Javier Albarrán live in person!

There were many great films at Fantastic Fest 2008, but a true standout was the outrageously ambitious action/comedy/fantasy/horror/sci-fi meltdown DOCTOR INFIERNO. Made with an absolute intense dedication by a group of rabid creators with very limited means, the film manages to capture a boiling fervor that is practically unequaled in the annals of entertainment.

The plot: a demented gynecologist discovers a cure for all the world's illnesses and uses it as leverage to become sole dictator of the earth. Jam-packed with monsters, kung fu, battling robots and deviant sexual practices, DR. INFIERNO doesn't let anything get in the way of an explosive fountain of impossible ideas.

Miss it and be damned. Get your tix here.

Nicolas López' SANTOS tonight at the Ritz!

Cine Las Americas presents SANTOS
Tuesday, April 28, 7:15pm, Alamo Ritz
Tickets available here

The Cine Las Americas Film Festival is giving us a chance to relive one of the highlights of Fantastic Fest 2008. This surreal super-powered superhero jam from Chile had it's world premiere at the Alamo South Lamar. If you missed it then, see it tonight at the Ritz!
Salvador Santos—bald, obese, and 33—does not look the superhero type. But after a strange inter-dimensional traveler warns him that his best friend, multimillionaire Arturo Antares, is actually a tyrant from another dimension who has been hiding in Arturo’s body, he has no other choice but to accept the challenge. His years of experience as a comic book artist will come in handy, especially when it comes time to save the love of his life, Laura Luna, from the evil grip of Nova.

Twenty-six-year-old director Nicolas López started his film career early, as he was only fifteen when he directed his first short film, “Pajero,” which was screened at local festivals in Chile. López has also been a columnist for the Chilean newspaper El Mecurio and worked closely with MTV Latin America, as a screenwriter for the MTV Music Awards and as an actor in his outrageous sitcom, Piloto MTV.

Tickets are available here

Caution: Dangerous Improv Tonight at the Ritz!

Les MsGeehee presents: THE WORLD'S MOST DANGEROUS IMPROV
Tonight, 7:45pm at the Alamo Ritz!
Get you tickets here

Legendary improv fanatic Les McGehee brings you the cream of the local improv crop, special guest stars from TV and film, and...The Most Dangerous Improv Comedy in the World!

Les McGehee has performed a ridiculous amount of improv comedy- 6000+ shows in the US, 13 other countries, in theaters and clubs, also on boats, ships, planes, trains, and helicopters, TV, radio, under a table, and in other languages. For The Most Dangerous Improv Comedy in the World, Les presents the best guests from Chicago/LA/NYC, and...The Most Dangerous Improv Comedy in the World!

Featuring improv challenges that can literally hurt, maim, cause baldness, or kill. Only the finest improvisers with fire in their bellies will survive games like "Oxygen Deprivation," "Mousetrap," and "Swinging Pendulum of Death." You might even be asked to join a game so don't pee yourself you scaredy chicken. For this very special show, Les (and his Danger Crew) play improv like only they can, then they debut a short comedy film, attempt "The Most Deadly Game," and more!

Last time we had Les out, the Ritz almost burned down. Tonight, let's see if we can finish the job.

Get your ticket here.

Smoker's Theater: THE MALTESE FALCON

Smoker's Theater: THE MALTESE FALCON
An outdoor screening of the Humphrey Bogart classic where everyone will be encouraged to light up!
Sat, April 25, 8pm, Tim and Karrie League's house
Get your advance tix right here!

Even though we all know smoking is bad for you, lots of us still do it. We can't help it; they just taste so damn good. Plus, it makes us look cool! There's nothing inherently cool about the little paper cylinders, of course, but sometimes it seems like every interesting person on earth has been a smoker. Even President Obama sneaks out on the Rose Garden veranda to burn one every now and again. It's like a little torch of rebellion.


Of course, it's also a little torch of addiction, so it's unsurprising that few smokers have ever made it through the classic John Huston/Humphrey Bogart film THE MALTESE FALCON without stepping outside to take a smoke. Every character in the film smokes incessantly. And it looks super cool.


Amusingly enough, before the film went into production Warner Brothers chief Jack Warner sent out a memo expressly forbidding the depiction of smoking in any of the studio's films. That was all Huston and Bogart needed to hear. From then on they were determined to make THE MALTESE FALCON the smokingest movie ever.

And now we're determined to have the smokingest screening of it ever.


We're putting up the outdoor screen in the front yard at Tim and Karrie League's house, and inviting everyone to smoke 'em if you got 'em. Fumee Cigar Lounge will be on hand with some cigars and games as well, so this should be one movie screening no tobacco enthusiast will want to miss.


If, however, you're a fan of celluloid but prefer your classic cinema cancer-free, you can also catch THE MALTESE FALCON smoke-free as part of our Big Screen classics series at The Ritz.

CRANK 2: HIGH VOLTAGE

CRANK 2: HIGH VOLTAGE
Opens Thurs, 4/16, Midnight at the Village
Get your advance tix here

I'm not usually a fan of Stephen King's writing. He always starts out with a cool idea, then let's it descend into the most boring and cliched conclusion possible, and it drives me CRAZY.

Late last year, however, Mr. King wrote the Single Greatest Piece of his entire career within the confines of his regular column for Entertainment Weekly. In his picks for the top ten movies of 2008, he chose not one, but TWO movies starring Jason Statham. Sure, he picked SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE and THE DARK KNIGHT and a lot of other films that the usual critics put on their lists, but he's the only writer I've seen who was smart enough to include both DEATH RACE and THE BANK JOB onto his list.

And he didn't put those movies on his list for their screenplays, or the direction, or any of that nonsense. He just recognizes what Tim and I have known for quite some time now (since CRANK 1, actually): Jason Statham is pure dynamite, packed into a flesh and blood body with the sole purpose of exploding on screen.

Now, don't get me wrong. My love affair with Mr. Statham doesn't blind me to some of his career's... inconsistencies. The weirdo dialogue in TRANSPORTER 3 bored me to tears. But the dissatisfaction I felt for that film only has me more excited for tonight's opening of CRANK 2, because when he has to rub up against an old lady wearing a sweater to create enough static electricity to jump start his heart so he can keep chasing down the bad guys, there won't be any time for that sort of "talking tenderly" to each other bullshit.

I shouldn't have to say anything to really sell you on this movie, though; just take a look at the trailer, which is perfect.

Now watch it again, just for good measure.

And now I'm sure we'll see you at the Village for the stunning 4k digital presentation of the greatest action movie of the summer.

Wanna get really crazy? Bring a 9 volt battery with you. I'm licking mine every time Statham electrocutes himself so I can get the maximum amount of amped up throughout the entire film...
(Henri)

WILCO: ASHES OF AMERICAN FLAGS

WILCO: ASHES OF AMERICAN FLAGS
Weds, Apr 15, 9:50pm at the Ritz
Grab your advance tix here!

It’s entirely possible that Wilco is the most filmed band of its generation: There was the 1997 HBO special, its part in the 1999 Billy Bragg/Woody Guthrie documentary MAN IN THE SAND, its own 2002 documentary I AM TRYING TO BREAK YOUR HEART and three appearances on AUSTIN CITY LIMITS.

Taken together, they are a chronicle of the band’s evolution from ragged roots-rockers to what Old 97’s singer Rhett Miller once called “German noise machine.” Each incarnation of Wilco has had its charms, but the current lineup is easily the tightest and most technically adept version of the band, as deftly shown on ASHES OF AMERICAN FLAGS (Nonesuch), a new film by Brendan Canty and Christoph Green.

Part concert film, part documentary, ASHES captures one of America’s best bands at its absolute height. The movie is lovingly shot, with intimate close-ups while the band performs interspersed with shots framing skeletal trees stark against the gloaming sky as Wilco’s tour bus rolls through empty expanses of America.

There’s plenty of interaction with the band, with the musicians talking about the musical qualities of one another and offering insights into themselves: Pat Sansone talks about taking Polaroids of fading pieces of American cities, John Stirratt recounts growing up outside New Orleans, Nels Cline talks about giving himself whiplash on stage and Jeff Tweedy muses philosophically over the role of music in modern life. There’s evidence here of a tighter bond in this group than there has been at any other time in Wilco’s 15-year history.

The most electrifying moments, though, come when the band is on stage, as Cline rips into his guitar solo on “Impossible Germany,” or Glenn Kotche furiously attacks his drums in the noisy middle part of “Via Chicago,” or, perhaps best of all, the whole band tears through “Shot in the Arm” with white-hot intensity.

It’s the next best thing to actually seeing Wilco in concert. (listendammit.com)

Girlie Night: PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

Girlie Night presents
PRIDE AND PREJUDICE
Tues, Apr 14, 7:45pm at the Ritz
Grab your tickets here

Two words: Mr. Darcy.

Seriously, this description should just end there because WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED? What more does ANY woman need than the brooding, handsome, totally swoon-worthy Mr. Darcy?

Ok, well, Pemberly doesn't hurt. Nor do all of the fancy balls and gorgeous dresses and romantic intrigue and GAH I want to hate Elizabeth Bennet for being such a lucky bitch but I can't. She's too awesome.

Now, you may be one of those Austen purists who will only watch the BBC version with Colin Firth (which is, admittedly, a masterpiece). If so, I feel the need to point out that hello, did you miss the POINT of the story? It's not good to be prideful OR prejudiced! Give this 2005 version a chance, and within minutes you'll be enchanted by the new interpretation of the characters (although Keira is still way too skinny) and even the non-Colin Firth Mr. Darcy (not, it turns out, an oxymoron!).

Oh you guys, I'm getting so excited just writing about it! Like when they almost kiss in the rain and when Judi Dench shows up and Lizzy realizes she still has a chance and OMG! I can't wait for Girlie Night so we can all swoon together! (Sarah Pitre)

HARVEY (Wallbanger) comes to the Ritz!

Cinema Cocktails: HARVEY
Saturday, April 11 & Sunday, April 12 (Easter!) at the Ritz
Get you tickets here

Jimmy Stewart was never more enchanting, lovable or drunk as he is in the whimsical-but-realist tale of Elwood Dowd, a man who's either terminally insane or has a giant invisible rabbit friend named Harvey.

At cinema cocktails we love to have fun with specialty drinks. For those of you who know the storyline, the martini drinking Jimmy Stewart and his seemingly martini-induced friend makes HARVEY a shoe-in for the cocktail series. It also happens to be a great film, and we happen to have a beautiful 35mm print!

In crafting the special cocktail for this one, the name “Harvey” naturally led us to the Harvey Wallbanger, which was invented in 1952 by three-time world champion mixologist Donato 'Duke' Antone, the brother-in-law of New York state Senator Carlo Lanzillotti... (We don't just pour booze into glasses at the Ritz, we really do our homework.)

The Harvey Wallbanger is a three part drink made with vodka, Galliano, and orange juice. Never had one? Here’s your chance!

But that’s not all. We couldn’t let the martini reference from the movie escape us, so we’ve crafted the Wallbanger Martini from orange vodka, Galliano, a touch of Amaretto and a muddled orange ring. For the purist, our regular martinis will be available as well.

Show up with a stuffed bunny and get 5% off of your bill!

Come dressed as a bunny, we'll assume you've been over-served!

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE at the Village!

Okay, to be fair, Justin isn't going to be at the Village in person. If he was, I wouldn't be writing this and would just be hanging out there, standing by the front door, never falling asleep, and waiting, just... waiting.

Because Justin Timberlake is pure pop royalty, and if you think that's a joke, or he's a flash in the pan, then you need to get over yourself for just one night and experience everything a Justin Timberlake Sing-Along can be.

Sorry. I get defensive.

The point is, the JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE SING-ALONG is one of our favorite pop music shows of the year, and that's saying something. We're really looking forward to next week's 1987 SING-ALONG PARTY, but we're also definitely sorry to be seeing these past few weeks' worth of JT shows coming to a close.

We've got two more shows left before Justin leaves the Alamo for the year, and they're both happening tonight. The show at the Ritz? It's already sold out. But we've been expanding our Sing-Alongs up to the new beautiful 4k projectors at the Village as well, and because the series is newer up there, as of this writing you can still grab tickets to tonight's show.

But don't wait until the last minute to get yours. The show is tonight, Thursday, April 9, at 10pm at the Alamo Village. Grab your tickets here, and we'll all bring sexy back together.

All-new all-amazing GI JOE Stop Motion Film Festival - Wed at Ritz!

THE 2nd ANNUAL GI JOE STOP MOTION FILM FESTIVAL
Weds, April 8, at the Ritz
Advance tix available here

Inspired by Gio Toninelo's popular internet series POND PATROL, the GI JOE STOP MOTION FILM FESTIVAL is the nation's best (and only) festival dedicated solely to screening the work of stop-motion artists who use GI Joe or similar figures (12", 8" and 3 3/4" sizes) as main characters or actors.

The festival includes films from all over the world, featuring some of the best (and surprisingly smooth) stop-motion animation out there.

Expect excessive violence, twisted humor, boundless creativity and no less than four disturbingly original applications for the Kung-Fu Grip! Brain-quenching action-figure action that will remind us all how much fun it is to play with toys!

Read this hilarious Austin Decider interview with GI JOE Film Festival curator Gio Toninelo!

Last year's sold out and wowed the crowd, so get those tickets now HERE!

YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN

THE YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN QUOTE-ALONG
Tues, 4/7 at the Alamo Village
click here for tickets to that show
Thurs, 4/9 at the Alamo Ritz
click here for tickets to that show

An affectionate parody that pays homage to the FRANKENSTEIN films (from the novel FRANKENSTEIN by Mary Shelley) directed by James Whale in the 1930s, YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN is both a zany comedy and a cinematic tour de force.

Written by director Mel Brooks and the film's star, Gene Wilder, YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN has all the usual -- and in this case slightly unusual -- suspects: the reluctant scientist Frederick Frankenstein, who is actually the grandson of the infamous creature-creator (pronounced "Fronken-steen" and played by Wilder), his spoiled fiancee (Madeline Kahn), Igor the pop-eyed hunchback (Marty Feldman), his dizzy assistant (Teri Garr), the castle's hideous head housekeeper (Cloris Leachman), and, of course, the Monster (Peter Boyle).

Highlights include the sets, which are the original ones used in the Whale films; the beautiful black-and-white cinematography; and the fine screenplay. Combining noirish elegance with uproarious sight gags and double entendres is a feat Brooks pulls off fabulously, directing the wonderful ensemble to act with sensitivity and humanistic feelings as well as with lunatic abandon. YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN is a treat from beginning to end.

Of course, as with any Quote-Along, the fun on screen is just the beginning. We'll have all of our favorite lines subtitled and ready to be yelled out in unison, and the props for this show will be some of the best toys we've brought out yet...

DAVE ENGLAND and EMILY HUBLEY: Self-Destruction meets Self-Expression at The Ritz!

Two very exciting (and very different) guests will be joining us at The Alamo Ritz this weekend.

The first is Dave England of JACKASS fame (pictured above eating an omelette made of his own vomit). If self-destruction is an art, Dave England of masochistic comedy adventurers JACKASS is a goddamn Picasso. We've somehow convinced this human wrecking ball/pincushion to join us at the Alamo to host his most brutally agonizing moments from both JACKASS films as well as the relentlessly abusive TV series, and also perform his special brand of one-man annihilation LIVE. Keep in mind that this is a man who has been trampled, railroaded, filleted, burned, concussed...and also has taken a poo in a hardware store display toilet, and you're just starting to scratch the surface of what human endurance really means.

If you delight in the suffering of others - and who doesn't? - we'll see you in the front row to catch some of the shrapnel! Tickets are HERE!

* * * * * *

We'll also be spotlighting the work of innovative filmmaker/animator Emily Hubley with her feature film THE TOE TACTIC. Combining animation and live action, the film tells the story of Mona Peek, a young woman grieving her father's death and hunting for her lost wallet in a world populated by lonely neighbors, animated objects and a songwriting Elevator Man - all of whom are manipulated by a card game played by four capricious dogs, voiced by David Cross, Eli Wallach, Andrea Martin and Marion Seldes. The music score is by Yo La Tengo.

Hubley's animations have delighted audiences for years in the short format, and in her brilliant work in HEDWIG AND THE ANGRY INCH. Now she has brought her talents and sensibilities to the big screen. Tickets are available HERE!