Ultimate JAWS Floating Roadshow on sale Wednesday!

JAWS!!! on Lake Travis!
Fri, July 2 - Tickets HERE!

The most legendary Rolling Roadshow event in history is BACK!

We've been doing Rolling Roadshows for years now, showcasing the finest films under the night sky in glorious 35mm, and Austin has been home to many of our very greatest events. But when people reminisce about Roadshow history, one show comes up without fail: The Ultimate JAWS Experience!

Well, we're fearlessly returning to the depths with a full-scale white-knuckle no-babies FLOATING JAWS SCREENING where YOU can watch the most terrifying aquatic horror film in history while adrift on an inner tube (supplied by us) in beautiful, deep, dark Lake Travis. We hereby guarantee the most heart-stopping screening on Earth, with a few added surprises to make sure you're awake and alert.

This event is limited, and considering the 2004 screening was the movie event of the year, we recommend you nab those spots quick! Tickets go on sale Wednesday June 16 at noon HERE!

Austin's own LOVERS OF HATE at The Ritz!

LOVERS OF HATE with director Bryan Poyser!
Mon - Wed at Ritz

In this delicious tale of deceit and sibling rivalry, two adult brothers represent failure and success. Younger brother Paul is a successful author who writes Harry Potter-like fantasy novels for children, while Rudy, Paul's childhood collaborator on the stories, moves from job to job, unable to get started on his own novel - the long-gestating "Lovers of Hate." The one thing they do have in common is their love for Rudy's soon-to-be ex-wife. When opportunistic Paul whisks Diana away to a romantic mountain retreat, the lovers have no idea that Rudy has made it there first. From the shadows of the posh chalet, Rudy tries desperately to sabotage their relationship in director Bryan Poyser's (DEAR PILLOW) brilliantly executed game of cat and mouse.

LOVERS OF HATE delicately balances humor and despair while pushing characters to painful and hilarious extremes. Co-produced by Marcy Garriott (INSIDE THE CIRCLE) and Jay Duplass & Mark Duplass (THE PUFFY CHAIR, CYRUS).

Get your tickets HERE!

Get Zzanged! with ZAPPED!!!

Zzang!!!! presents ZAPPED!
Rare 35mm screening! Only 5 bucks!
Sunday at Ritz!

About ZZANG!!!: There is absolutely no disputing that the '80s were The Decade of FUN. Neon-streaked good times exploded worldwide in the form of celebrities (Pee-Wee, Mr. T, Max Headroom), music (punk, new wave, metal) and -- in an epic lightning bolt of unrelenting wildness -- MOVIES! Well, local spazzmatics Zack Carlson and Bryan Connolly demand that YOU join us in hailing the Power of the '80s in the Alamo's newest monthly 35mm screening series: ZZANG!!!

Now...about ZAPPED!: Truly the most zzangin' scifi boner comedy of the '80s!!! Some would say ZAPPED! is simply the story of a high school chemist who gains the power to unhook bras with his brain. BUT!...they'd be neglecting to mention that it's a NUCLEAR DETONATION OF PURE ENTERTAINMENT!

That winning combination of Scott Baio and Willie Aames first found its footing in this unjustly disregarded send-up of Brian DePalma's CARRIE. Baio plays Barney, a junior genius who inadvertently creates a serum that allows him to perform any act he wishes. His newfound skills result in ripped blouses, flying ventriloquist dummies and more ripped blouses. Later, two bullies are given a mind-powered liftoff midway through a mooning, causing them to float through the air with their bare asses aimed at heaven.

But the film's most inspired moment comes courtesy of the great Scatman Crothers as the gym coach. After accidentally inhaling some chemically engineered SuperMarijuana, he hallucinates that he's riding a bicycle with Albert Einstein. Suddenly, the Scatman's wife appears on a Roman chariot, firing at them with a bazooka full of salami.

If this doesn't sound like fun to you, get the hell off my planet!! ZZANG!!!

Tickets HERE, for low '80s prices!

Pathos! Angst! Batman! Shrek! THE REINACTORS!

THE REINACTORS
Wed 9:30 at The Ritz!

This incredible, critically acclaimed doc interweaves the disparate lives of film character impersonators and celebrity look-a-likes on Hollywood Boulevard over the span of a year. Recognizable characters and stars of movies are portrayed by anyone who chooses to buy the costume and brave the mean streets of Hollywood.

These self-employed rogues forge a living one dollar at a time, posing for photos with tourists in front of Grauman's Chinese Theater. These street characters have big dreams of breaking into the big-time as they struggle to make ends meet. Freddy Krueger works alongside Superman, Marilyn Monroe, Shrek, Batman, Borat and Lucy Ricardo. Competing Chewbaccas, Spidermen and Captain Jack Sparrows vie for a spot on the limited real estate of The Walk Of Fame.

The story unfolds through their colorful day-to-day lives and incredibly dramatic back-stories. Director Markey says, "The doc plays like a great depression era Hollywood classic retold for the new millennium. It's also a film about the cutthroat nature backstage and behind the scenes of show business. A statement on where we're at culturally. An American Idol on crack, if you will."

Get your tickets here...cheap!

A "VERY SPECIAL" EPISODE!

A VERY SPECIAL EPISODE
Monday, 7:30 at The Ritz

A special one-time-only brainwrecker from the mad geniuses at The Cinefamily!

It's an all-too-familiar moment: the commercial fades, a somber piano line is struck, and in a low, austere rumble the announcer says "On a very special episode of..." Many a TV sitcom has been hazily defined in our memories by its "very special episodes"; the installments in which the monotony of lameness is broken by a confusing left turn into cheap, sappy dramatics. One of the ensemble cast gains a drug addiction, has a brush with death, experiences violence that hits close to home, etc.

Most often, these episodes have only the power to make one retch with their saccharine lip service to the "cause of the week" -- but then there are those rare occasions when, due to the intervention of the TV gods, things go off-the-cliff bat-shit crazy! Come see five of the finest examples of what happens when a Very Special Episode gets waaaaay too special, with child molestation, death scenes, cast members getting backhanded across the room by drunken guest stars, prostitution and more! The heart bleeds with excitement!!!

Cheap cheap cheap tickets HERE!

"And I DON'T wanna miss a thing!!!"

Action Pack Theater presents
ARMAGEDDON
Sunday, June 6 at the Ritz
Tickets here!

Live Explosions!

Before Michael Bay was tarnishing our childhoods with racially stereotyped robots, he was blowing our minds with threats of global annihilation and...regular human stereotypes. Ever since that marketing countdown clock appeared at my local cinema announcing ARMAGEDDON's arrival, I knew my world was going to change, and man did it ever! From that point on, I now rank all films on a one-to-five ARMAGEDDON scale: 1 being 1/10th as good as ARMAGEDDON, and 5 being half as good as ARMAGEDDON (which is as good as any movie could ever hope to be). Join us for Action Pack Theater Presents ARMAGEDDON where we will be embracing our natural handicap for immaturity and blowing as much pyro as we possibly can in the span of ARMAGEDDON's spectacular 150 minute run time. Join big dick Harry Stamper (Bruce Willis) and his rag-tag group of roughnecks as they take 12 days to train for the world-saving mission no man at NASA would dare embark on: stop an asteroid the size of Texas from eliminating all life on Earth as we know it. We will be handing out confetti guns to recreate chaff floating around on the asteroid, also we might have some animal crackers for you to run around on your love ones tummy with while we sing along to the single greatest movie anthem of all time (suck it, TITANIC!), Aerosmith's I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing. So come on out and join the shuttles Freedom and Independence and do the same thing with other people at the exact same time, because otherwise, what the hell are we trying to save? (Greg MacLennan)

MOCK-yeah!-ING-yeah!-BIRD-yeah!

The Action Pack presents:
THE DUMB AND DUMBER QUOTE-ALONG
ONE NIGHT ONLY!
Thursday, June 3 at S. Lamar
TICKETS HERE!

I know what you're thinking. Just when you thought The Action Pack couldn't possibly be any dumber, we go and do something like this...and totally redeem ourselves!

Harry and Lloyd are traveling cross country to return a briefcase to the woman Lloyd loves. Sure he's only met her once, but she gave him that kind of old fashioned romantic feeling where he just knew he would do anything to bone her. Of course what these idiots don't know is they accidentally picked up a ransom briefcase and are being pursued by trained killers. This movie is a quote storm of non-stop hilarity. Even if you've never seen it before, where else can you see someone sell a beheaded bird to a blind child, a sheepdog van, and hear the most annoying sound in the world? Plus if you play your cards right you might be able to order up a ton of food and then Seabass the guy sitting next to you. If you promise to sing "Mockingbird" with us at The Action Pack's DUMB & DUMBER Quote Along we promise we won't put any Turbo Lax in your drinks...
(Greg MacLennan)